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This cuty-pie earth elemental was so big and cuddly, we collectively went to /hug him. Lo-and-behold, he liked this so much that he decided to clone himself. We continued caressing his offspring until they themselves decided to split up again in even more toddlers. At that point we realised these shardy elementals bore a striking similarity to crystal meth on their backs and ground em to bits. As you can see from the resulting kill video's lack of people left standing: drugs are bad!
This natural monstrosity reminded us of our teenage years, where post-weekend battles with groin-based fungal and yeast infections were fairly common. With the help of our goblin friends, we put on our best tar-enchants and gave Brackenspore an industrial anti-fungal treatment. We call him Brokenspore now.